Sick And Bereavement Leave In NZ: Who Counts As Immediate Family?

When someone on your team loses a loved one, the legal side of leave entitlements can suddenly feel very real - and very time-sensitive.

As an employer, you’re balancing a few things at once: supporting your employee, keeping the business running, and making sure you’re complying with New Zealand employment law (without accidentally setting an unhelpful precedent).

One of the most common practical questions we hear from small businesses is: who actually counts as “immediate family” for bereavement leave? Closely followed by: what about extended family, cultural responsibilities, or “like a parent to me” relationships?

Below, we’ll break down how bereavement leave works in NZ, what the law says about close family members, and how you can handle “grey area” situations fairly and consistently.

What Is Bereavement Leave In New Zealand (And How Does It Interact With Sick Leave)?

Bereavement leave in New Zealand is a minimum entitlement under the Holidays Act 2003.

It exists specifically to give employees paid time off when someone close to them dies. Importantly, bereavement leave isn’t the same thing as sick leave - but in real life, grief often impacts health and wellbeing, so you’ll sometimes see both entitlements come up in the same situation.

Minimum bereavement leave entitlements

In general terms, eligible employees are entitled to:

• 3 days’ bereavement leave on the death of a close family member (as defined by the Act); and
• 1 day’s bereavement leave on the death of another person, if the employer accepts the employee has suffered a bereavement due to their relationship with that person.

To be eligible, an employee generally needs to have completed at least 6 months’ employment with you (either 6 months’ continuous employment, or meeting the Act’s work-pattern test over 6 months).

Bereavement leave is paid at the employee’s “relevant daily pay” or “average daily pay” (depending on the situation), just like other leave calculations under the Holidays Act.

Where sick leave fits in (especially with grief)

Sick leave is also a minimum entitlement under the Holidays Act 2003, and it can be relevant where:

• your employee is unwell due to grief (including stress, anxiety, depression or other mental health impacts);
• the employee needs medical appointments or treatment following a bereavement; or
• the employee needs to care for a dependent who is unwell.

In practice, an employee might take bereavement leave for the immediate period around the funeral/tangihanga, and then later use sick leave if their grief is affecting their ability to work.

From an employer perspective, the key is to categorise leave correctly (for payroll and record-keeping), and apply a consistent process. Your Employment Contract and internal policies are a great place to set this out clearly.

What Counts As “Immediate Family” For Immediate Family Bereavement Leave?

The phrase “immediate family” gets used a lot in workplaces, but what matters legally is the definition under the Holidays Act 2003 - which uses the term “close family member”.

For the purpose of bereavement leave, the Act provides specific categories that generally trigger the 3-day entitlement.

Immediate family members (commonly covered)

While each situation needs to be checked against the wording of the Act and the employee’s circumstances, the “close family member” category typically includes:

• a spouse or partner;
• a parent;
• a child;
• a sibling (brother or sister);
• a grandparent;
• a grandchild;
• your employee’s spouse/partner’s parent.

So if your employee’s mother passes away, that’s usually straightforward: it’s bereavement leave and it’s generally 3 days (assuming they meet the eligibility requirements).

The same tends to apply to a spouse/partner, child, or sibling.

Step-parents, blended families, whāngai, and modern family structures

This is where employers can get nervous - because “family” doesn’t always look like a neat list.

In many cases, relationships like step-parents or step-children may still fall within the ordinary meaning of “parent” or “child” depending on the real relationship and caregiving role - but it won’t always be automatic.

If your employee says a person who passed away was effectively their parent (even if not a biological parent), don’t assume it’s excluded. This is a good moment to:

• ask a few respectful questions about the nature of the relationship (without prying); and
• consider whether this fits the “close family member” definition or the “other person where bereavement is suffered” pathway.

Even when the relationship doesn’t fit the strict “close family member” categories, there may still be a legal entitlement to 1 day bereavement leave (more on that below).

What About Extended Family Or Someone Outside The Legal “Immediate Family” List?

Not every bereavement will involve a “close family member” under the Act - but that doesn’t mean there’s no entitlement.

The Holidays Act allows 1 day of bereavement leave if the employee has suffered a bereavement due to the death of another person, and the employer accepts that the employee has suffered bereavement in that situation.

How do you decide if 1 day applies?

When deciding whether your employee is entitled to 1 day bereavement leave for a person outside the close family member categories, the Holidays Act expects employers to consider factors like:

• how close the association was between the employee and the deceased;
• whether the employee was involved in aspects of the funeral/tangihanga or other arrangements;
• cultural responsibilities the employee may have (this is especially relevant in Aotearoa New Zealand); and
• any other relevant factors that show the employee has suffered a bereavement.

In other words, it’s not just about blood relations - it’s about the real-world impact of the death on your employee and their responsibilities.

Common examples that may qualify (depending on the facts)

• An aunt/uncle who helped raise the employee
• A cousin the employee lived with or supported
• A close friend (particularly if the employee is organising or heavily involved in the farewell)
• A former partner (depending on ongoing connection and responsibilities)
• A colleague or business partner in a small team (sometimes relevant where there’s a close association)

As a small business, you don’t need to “investigate” someone’s grief - but you do need a consistent, lawful approach so you’re not seen as arbitrary or unfair.

This is exactly the kind of issue that’s easier when you’ve got a clear Workplace Policy and a manager process for handling leave requests.

Handling Cultural Obligations And “Grey Area” Relationships Fairly (Without Setting Yourself Up For Disputes)

From an HR perspective, bereavement leave questions often become tricky when:

• the relationship isn’t a standard legal category; and/or
• the employee needs time off that goes beyond the minimum entitlement (for example, travel, multi-day gatherings, or cultural commitments).

Start with the legal minimum, then move to what’s reasonable for your business

A practical way to approach it is:

1. Confirm the minimum entitlement under the Holidays Act (3 days or 1 day, depending on the relationship and circumstances, and whether the employee is eligible).
2. Discuss what additional time is needed (if any) and what options exist.
3. Document what’s agreed so payroll and managers are aligned.

If the employee needs more time than their bereavement leave entitlement, common options might include:

• annual leave (by agreement);
• leave without pay (if appropriate);
• alternative working arrangements temporarily (reduced hours, adjusted duties, remote work); or
• other discretionary leave provided under your own policies (if you choose to offer that).

Be careful about making promises that aren’t reflected in writing. If you regularly provide extra paid bereavement leave “as a kindness”, it can become an expectation - and you may end up with inconsistency problems later.

Consistency matters (especially if you have multiple managers)

In a growing business, different managers may interpret bereavement leave rules differently, which can create:

• employee complaints about unfair treatment;
• payroll errors (mis-coded leave);
• privacy issues if managers ask for unnecessary details; and
• relationship breakdowns that can escalate into disputes.

This is one reason many SMEs implement a simple leave policy and manager checklist in a Staff Handbook - so the process is clear even when the situation is emotional and time-pressured.

Can You Ask For Proof Of Bereavement Leave? What Evidence Is Appropriate?

Employers often worry about abuse of leave, but you also don’t want to handle a bereavement request in a way that feels harsh or intrusive.

Under the Holidays Act, employers can ask for evidence in some situations - but it should be a reasonable request, made and handled sensitively.

What kind of evidence might be reasonable?

Depending on the situation, reasonable evidence could include:

• a funeral notice or service sheet;
• a letter from a funeral home;
• a death notice/link (where publicly available); or
• a statutory declaration (less common, but sometimes used in disputed situations).

In many workplaces, especially smaller teams, you may not need to ask for evidence at all - particularly where the relationship is clear and there’s no reason to doubt the request.

Be mindful of privacy when collecting evidence

If you do ask for evidence, treat it as sensitive personal information and keep access limited.

A good benchmark is: collect the minimum you need, store it securely, and don’t share it internally except on a strict need-to-know basis (for example, payroll).

This is where an Employee Privacy Handbook can help you set expectations about what information you collect, why you collect it, and how it’s handled.

Record-keeping and payroll coding

Even if you don’t keep “proof”, you should still keep good records of:

• the dates of bereavement leave taken;
• whether it was paid bereavement leave (and if 3 days or 1 day applies);
• any additional leave taken (annual leave/leave without pay); and
• any agreement about returning to work or temporary changes to duties/hours.

Good records protect you if there’s later confusion, a payroll audit, or an employment relationship issue.

How To Set Up A Simple Process For Bereavement Leave Requests (So You’re Protected From Day One)

When you’re running a small business, you don’t want a 10-step HR workflow. You want something your team can follow quickly and respectfully.

Here’s a practical framework many SMEs use.

1) Put the basics in writing

Your starting point should be:

• a clear Employment Contract that references minimum leave entitlements; and
• a policy that explains how leave requests are made, approved, recorded and paid.

Even a short policy can save a lot of confusion later - particularly if you have shift workers, multiple locations, or a mix of employees and casuals.

If you do engage casual staff, remember their entitlements can differ in practice depending on whether they meet eligibility thresholds. It’s worth understanding how this works (and making sure payroll is aligned) with Casual Workers’ Leave Entitlements.

2) Train managers on the “immediate family” approach

Your managers don’t need to memorise legislation, but they should know:

• the difference between 3 days vs 1 day bereavement leave;
• the types of relationships that typically fall under the Act’s “close family member” categories;
• how to respond appropriately to grey area requests; and
• when to escalate to the business owner/HR/payroll.

Consistency is what protects you - and it also builds trust with your team.

3) Decide how you’ll handle extra time off

Common issues that come up include travel (especially for employees with whānau overseas) and multi-day cultural observances.

Think in advance about what options you’re comfortable offering. For example:

• employees can take annual leave after bereavement leave ends;
• employees can request leave without pay; or
• temporary flexible working may be considered case-by-case.

If your business uses alternative arrangements like time off in lieu in other contexts, make sure you’re applying it properly and not as a substitute for statutory leave entitlements. Time Off In Lieu can be useful in the right situations, but it should be implemented carefully.

4) Keep communications respectful and minimal

A bereavement leave conversation should never feel like an interrogation.

A simple, employer-friendly approach is to ask only what you need to process the request, such as:

• who has passed away (relationship category, not details);
• what dates the employee needs off; and
• whether they expect to need more leave beyond the bereavement entitlement.

Then confirm in writing (even a short email) what leave type is being applied and for what dates.

5) Make sure your policies work together

Bereavement leave is often linked with other “people” issues: absence management, flexible working, privacy, and health and safety (mental wellbeing is part of health and safety in a practical sense).

Rather than having scattered documents, many SMEs prefer an overall Workplace Policy set (or handbook) so it’s clear how everything fits together.

Key Takeaways

• Bereavement leave is a Holidays Act 2003 entitlement, and the legal starting point is the Act’s definition of a close family member (not just workplace custom).
• Eligible employees are generally entitled to 3 days’ bereavement leave for the death of a close family member, and may be entitled to 1 day for the death of another person where they have suffered a bereavement and the employer accepts that.
• When the relationship is a “grey area”, employers should consider closeness, involvement in arrangements, and cultural responsibilities, and apply a consistent decision-making process.
• Bereavement leave and sick leave can both come up around the same event, but they’re different entitlements - make sure leave is correctly categorised and recorded.
• You can ask for evidence in some situations, but keep requests reasonable and handle any documents carefully to avoid privacy issues.
• A clear Employment Contract and leave policy (often in a handbook) helps managers respond quickly, lawfully, and respectfully.

If you’d like help reviewing your leave clauses, updating your policies, or making sure you’re applying bereavement leave entitlements correctly across your team, you can reach us at 0800 002 184 or team@sprintlaw.co.nz for a free, no-obligations chat.